Cutting and Self-Harm: Understanding the Struggle & Recovery

Can You Relate to This?

Nancy runs a razor blade across her skin. The sting doesn’t scare her. Instead, it brings relief. The deep, overwhelming emotions inside her—fear, guilt, self-loathing—momentarily quiet down. For those few moments, she feels in control. Then, the cycle begins again.

Do you know someone like Nancy? Or maybe you see parts of yourself in her story. Millions of people self-harm—not for attention, but as a way to cope with emotional pain, anger, sadness, or guilt.

If that’s you, or someone you care about, you’re not alone. And more importantly, there is a way out.

Cutting and Self-Harm: Why It Happens and How to Cope

What Is Self-Harm?

Self-harm is any intentional act of hurting oneself to manage overwhelming emotions. It includes:

• Cutting (using razors, knives, or sharp objects)
• Burning
• Scratching or picking at skin
• Hitting oneself or punching walls
• Preventing wounds from healing
• Substance abuse (drugs, alcohol)
• Reckless behavior (unsafe sex, dangerous driving)

Cutting is one of the most common forms. People often cut their arms, legs, or stomach—sometimes deeply, sometimes just enough to see blood.

But self-harm is never just about the physical act. It’s about what’s happening emotionally underneath.

Why Do People Self-Harm?

Self-harm isn’t a suicide attempt. It’s a coping mechanism—a way to feel something, to regain control, to distract from emotional pain.

People who self-harm often struggle with:

• Trauma (abuse, neglect, bullying)
• Mental health conditions (depression, anxiety, PTSD, borderline personality disorder)
• Low self-esteem or body image issues
• Difficulty expressing emotions or managing stress
• Feeling emotionally numb
• Impulsive or risk-taking behavior

It’s a myth that people who self-harm are “just seeking attention.” In reality, most do it in secret, out of shame or fear of being misunderstood.

Signs Someone May Be Self-Harming

If you’re worried about a friend or loved one, look for these signs:

• Unexplained scars or cuts (especially on arms, legs, or stomach)
• Wearing long sleeves or pants, even in hot weather
• Sharp objects (razors, knives, bottle caps) in their personal belongings
• Blood stains on clothes, towels, or sheets
• Sudden mood changes—withdrawal, irritability, sadness

If you notice these signs, don’t ignore them. The best thing you can do is let them know you care and are willing to listen—without judgment.

The Hidden Dangers of Self-Harm

While self-harm might seem like a short-term relief, it comes with serious risks:

• Addiction – It can become a compulsive behavior, making it harder to stop.
• Infections & Scars – Wounds can get infected, and scars can be permanent.
• Accidental Injury – A deeper cut than intended could lead to severe blood loss or nerve damage.
• Worsening Mental Health – Without addressing the root cause, self-harm can escalate to depression, substance abuse, or suicidal thoughts.

If you’re self-harming, it’s okay to ask for help. You deserve support.

How to Stop Self-Harming: Practical Techniques

If you’re struggling with self-harm, there are ways to replace it with healthier coping strategies.

1. Identify Your Triggers

Pay attention to what makes you want to self-harm. Is it stress, sadness, anger, numbness? Once you know your triggers, you can develop healthier ways to cope.

2. Find a Safe Substitute for Self-Harm

If you feel numb:

• Take a cold shower or run an ice cube over your skin.
• Hold something textured like sandpaper or a piece of rough fabric.

If you feel angry:

• Rip up a piece of paper or punch a pillow.
• Go for a run or do an intense workout.
• Listen to music that matches your emotions.

If you feel overwhelmed:

• Write everything down, then tear up the paper.
• Squeeze a stress ball or hold onto something grounding, like a smooth stone.

If you still feel the urge to cut:

• Use a red marker to draw lines on your skin.
• Snap a rubber band against your wrist.
• Hold an ice cube in your hand—it creates a sharp sensation without harm.

3. Talk to Someone

The shame around self-harm can make it feel impossible to open up. But keeping it a secret only makes it worse. Find someone you trust—a friend, therapist, teacher, or a helpline. You don’t have to go through this alone.

Getting Help: You’re Not Alone

Stopping self-harm is hard, but it’s possible. Recovery starts with a single step: reaching out.

➡ Thinking about therapy but not sure where to start? Online therapy provides a safe, flexible way to get professional support from the comfort of your home. Learn more about your options in our guide on online therapy.

Crisis Helplines & Support

📞 National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (U.S.): 1-800-273-8255

📱 Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741

🏳️‍🌈 The Trevor Project (LGBTQ+ support): 1-866-488-7386

💬 The Jed Foundation: jedfoundation.org

💙 American Foundation for Suicide Prevention: afsp.org

📚 National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI): nami.org

Additional Resources

📖 Mind (UK): Self-harm – A detailed guide on self-harm, recovery, and coping strategies.

🩹 Mayo Clinic: Self-injury/Cutting – Explains causes, symptoms, and treatments.

💡 National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI): Self-Harm & Mental Health – Offers support groups and educational materials.

Final Thoughts: You Deserve Help & Healing

If you’re struggling with self-harm, you are not broken. You don’t have to fight this alone, and you don’t have to feel ashamed. There are people who care and want to help. Your pain is valid, but so is your right to healing.

You are stronger than your struggles, and you deserve support. Take that first step today.